Two Sure Fire Ways to Make You Buy More MakeUp

Tuesday, 12 October 2010
Photo Credit: Joan Crawford

You might say I am one lucky biatch for having a dream job in cosmetics.

Well it might have been fun and glam, but when you think about it, after all the jetsetting, the company credit card, the free make up, the glamorous photoshoots, the picking on models- the very essence of what i do is this-
I make sure you will spend more on make up year after year after year.
Let us say you spent 500$ last year and this year you spent only 490$.

One thing is absolutely certain. However well i wiggle my perfect peach shaped arse before the council of the clueless- the only way it is heading is to the unemployment office.

If you spent 515$, that is just 3% increase on a 6% growth rate industry, that is not good enough- I will still be fired but they will give me a slow, painful death- making sure that I suffer during council presentations by quizzing me the growth rate history of the discontinued lipstick used by David Bowie when he was Ziggy Stardust in the 80s.

My personal record (if I may brag) is a 13% increase in your spending.   Yes, I am your mommy.

Yet- I am not proud of myself.

You see, If I do not apply any manipulation, the only one real reason that you will buy make up is when you run out of what you are currently using.

Well, we do know that:
  • a good quality nail polish can perhaps be included in your will and testament (Take note- Caitylyn, you are sitting on a treasure chest of 400 nail polishes there- heehee!) 
  • and you will perhaps grow your pinky nail long so you can dig out the last remaining vestige of your favorite lipstick 
  • and gawd knows these freaking powders never expire!

So, if I leave you alone- I will be better off contemplating a career as a civil servant.

But since shuffling documents is not my bag, I since have developed sure fire strategy that will make you buy more than you need.  In essence there are two ways I can increase your spending.  That is by-

1)  Discontinuing the product that you lurv
Have you ever gone out to shop for just one particular product and then found out that it is gone- never to return again, so you have to compensate for its loss by buying not one but 4 replacements and yet, remain feeling empty?
Why, discontinuing your favorite lipstick can be beneficial to me in so many ways, because you will be open to my next step...
 2)  Giving you something exciting and "NEW".  And if i had my way, the following types of new would propel my career to instant councilhood -
  • a scientific breakthrough which will make your lashes give birth to more lashes like gremlins 
  • a  new packaging that vibrates like the romping rabbit  
But what if I do not really have anything new to offer?   What then?

Well- in the next post, I will tell you my Top Ten (or so) Tactics in Faking Newness to make you buy  more makeup.